Changing A Guy Vs A Guy Changing For You.

The allure of darkness, well isn’t that the typical romantic movie. How dreamy it is having a bad boy to come and ruffle those perfect little feathers of yours.

I always told myself “people don’t change” and most especially guys, whenever I’d meet a guy whom I was attracted to, once I notice something I find unacceptable in him I’d cut him off completely. With that mentality of mine, I’m pretty sure I missed out on some thrilling romances.

Even if he was willing to change for me, I’d tell him “don’t change for anyone much less me, if you feel you need to change do it because you want to be a better person, do it for you”.

What I failed to understand is that we’re all imperfect, in fact we don’t even realize we need to change certain habits or characters and finding someone who triggers the desire to be better, to do better; that’s amazing. Even better, being the person who inspires such change in another that’s more amazing.

One thing we should all agree about is don’t insist on changing a guy who doesn’t see nothing wrong with him.

There was this guy and he certainly defined the difference between “Changing A Guy” & “A Guy Changing For You”. He was tall, built and his smile 😍, he would always smile at me and I’d smile back or the other way around. He knew me completely, my likes became his likes and my dislikes became his.

He was the typical bad boy, at least most would describe him as that but with me he was a perfect gentleman. It was like around me he just couldn’t be that bad boy, around me he wanted to be the guy that I would like. He would watch his words and actions with me, slowly it started to influence his way of interacting with others.

He wanted me to show him how to be a better person, he knew no other way. I said I’m not interested in helping him because I saw it as work. I’ve always told myself that I won’t ever be the girl who fell stupidly in love with an undeserving guy and spends the best part of her life trying to change him.

What I didn’t understand was I wasn’t the one requesting for the change but rather it was him who wanted me to change him… I lost him…or should I say we lost each other. I could have helped him to be better and he could have helped me by showing me what love is. Now he’s with my friend and he’s learning worse ways of loving, every once in awhile I see a reflection of the man he could have been…now more than ever with her he can’t be it.

Falling in love is a beautiful thing and should never stop being beautiful, it being reciprocated is like being caught. People will fall in love without asking for permission, they do because of your essence you don’t always have to catch them, sometimes steadying them down is enough.

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